The Gingerbread House From Hell

Let me start off by saying that my Halloween gingerbread house, which I think was kind of ugly, was a piece of cake compared to this monstrosity. This house took more than 22 hours over three days to complete, and sucked away any Christmas spirit I had. Enter to experience the saga and see the finished product.



Day 1: The Baking
It took me two hours to make the templates for this house- the majority of that time was spent making the template for the front of the house. After I made them, I made the dough and took a break so it could chill. I started rolling out the dough at 5:00 and finished baking everything by 11:00. With the exception of making the templates, this part wasn't unbearable by any means. Any issues I had rolling and cutting the dough allowed me to figure out new techniques for next time.

Day 2: The Assembly
This was by far the worst part of making the house. Based off my experience with the Halloween house, I imagined if I started around 12:30, I would be able to get the house done by 3:00 to watch a few movies before dinner. I was very wrong. I must have messed something up in the royal icing, because the house would not stay together. Eventually I scraped off all the defective icing and attempted to find other means: packing tape, liquid nails, craft glue, and super glue. I finally figured out the best technique for getting the four walls to stand- attaching pieces of cardboard to the inside of the walls with icing, and taping the pieces together and to the board. Then I used icing to fill the cracks between the gingerbread pieces.

I also had major issues with the roof. Unfortunately I rolled the roof pieces too thick and the front walls too thin, so the roof was much too heavy for the house to support. The first time I attached the roof to the house the whole thing collapsed immediately; the second time it stayed on long enough for me to start shingling before it slid off. Once I got the four main walls standing with cardboard aid, I took a (mother mandated) break so I could take a shower and have Christmas Eve dinner. After dinner I worked on creating a contraption to handle some of the roof's weight. I ended up making my own box, which I filled with chickpeas and lentils for weight, and attached a box that had been cut and folded to match the slope of the roof and sit on the low side walls. With my mother's much needed and appreciated help, I piped frosting onto the sloped portion of the front and back walls, then spread a thick layer onto the cardboard to get the roof on the building. My mother decided we needed to let it dry overnight, so we improvised some supports to keep the roof in place (including a bowl of rice, a little plate, some cardboard, and a knife). By this point it was after 10:00, and I could not do any more.

Day 3: The Decorating
We went to see Mission: Impossible in the morning (It was super fun- I highly recommend it!), and I got back to it when we got home. Fortunately the roof stayed in place overnight, so I just needed to make it pretty. The wreath was already attached to the house because it was easier to put it on without the roof, and I had made the walkway on Day 2 before I put the roof on the second time; however I still needed to do the rest of the decorating. The house looked really tragic before I started decorating due to all the destruction on Day 2. None of the decorating was especially difficult, but it took several hours to complete.

If you read through all of this, I commend you. Here's the house:

This is what everything is made of:

Wall: 11 Hershey's bars

Roof Shingles: 312 half pieces of cinnamon gum

Walkway: Red Hots

Wreath: A piece of gingerbread covered in tree shaped sprinkles

Plants: Green spice drops

Trees: Gingerbread kransekakes covered with royal icing

I'm amazed the house looks as good as it does considering the amount of frustration I had while making it. After three days of work, I am taking a 2 day break. There will be posts the next two days, but they may not feature baked goods. Thanks for reading!